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What your favorite fifi color says about you

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fifi comes in five colors: Mack Black, Fire Red, Rugged Gray, Commando Camouflage, and Big Blue. Some of those are more popular than others, and we thought it might be fun to find out what psychological meaning each one might have. We’ve done some entirely scientific psychoanalysis on what your favorite fifi color says about you, and it’s not at all pulled out of our asses.

Mack Black

Black is simultaneously the most neutral and the sexiest color, which is probably what makes this a popular choice. But some of you are just mysterious dudes. You’re the hardest to pin down, but we’ll take a few guesses. The more your job lets you avoid the public the happier you’re likely to be. You’re the most likely to own a collection of band t-shirts and enjoy indoor leisure pursuits (make of that what you will). Some of you are kinky as hell.

Fire Red

You’re the kind of guy who doesn’t like to sit still for long. Adrenaline is what you crave, whether you play sports or ride a motorcycle. Any job that lets you get out from behind a desk and meet people will make you happiest. You’re probably not reading this because you’re off climbing a mountain or something.

Rugged Gray

No matter what, you like the surface of your inner lake to be smooth as glass. After you’ve considered all sides (which could take a long time) and formed an opinion, you’re unlikely to advertise it. You’re the hardest worker and the most dependable. Or, hey, maybe you just like sweatpants, and we don’t judge you for it. Sweatpants feel nice.

Commando Camouflage

You probably had a lot of green army men as a kid and grew up to join the military. You’re the most likely to go hunting or fishing in your spare time. Even if you have to live in a city, you probably like to escape to the country any chance you get. Or maybe you just took “camouflage” literally and you thought this fifi would be easier to hide.

Big Blue

This is the color equivalent of comfort food, so you’re the most likely to own the fuzziest blanket and the most comfortable couch. For you, “Netflix and chill” isn’t a euphemism but a way of life. You probably like to read and you might even do Tai Chi, because blue is also a color of intellect, wisdom, and serenity. If you could choose any pet, it probably would be a Golden Retriever.

What’s your favorite fifi color? Get your own fifi here in any of the five colors above.