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This is a world full of many fantastical sex toys for men, and we’re not just talking about our beloved fifi male masturbators. The dark days of settling for our hand, an old sock, or even a warm apple pie are fading into memory.

You might say we’re in a golden age of male masturbators, what with the Autoblow BJ robot, the Fleshlight (in a range of colors and textures), and more fuck dolls than we’ve ever seen at any point in recent memory.

It gets a lot more bizarre, though, if you venture deeper into the world of male sex toys where there are more, shall we say, specialized solutions. You can fuck a silicone foot called a vajankle or a fake woman’s torso that allows you to indulge in a titty-fucking fantasy. There are sounding rods for the truly adventurous, and if you don’t know where those go, proceed with caution as you Google. For those who like their woman to gag on their meat, there are fake doll heads that are supposed to give a better blowjob than a real person.

Hey, we don’t blame guys with fetishes for wanting to indulge their desires with weird sex toys, but sometimes all a dude wants is a tight hole to fuck. Maybe you just want something simple that feels good and doesn’t cost a lot. Even more importantly for a lot of guys is the ability to fuck it and forget it, not even needing to clean it or find a hiding place for it till the next session. That’s when you need a fifi, my friend.

You just roll up the fifi to your desired tightness with a disposable sleeve inside it. When you’ve done the deed, throw away the disposable sleeve. You can leave the fifi out in plain sight and no one has to know it’s a masturbator.

More power to those who like the weird sex toys. As for all of you dudes who like something a little more low-maintenance, get fifi here and find out why it’s the best male masturbator for you.