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Save your pie on Pi Day with the fifi sex toy for men

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March 14th is Pi Day, as in the number 3.14, and we’d like to share a public service announcement for this occasion. On behalf of pies and bakers everywhere, we’d like to direct your attention to the fifi male masturbation toy.

Anyone who has ever seen American Pie knows the old “fucking a warm apple pie” masturbation technique. If we had to guess, we think there probably are a lot of guys who have been bored or curious enough to try this offbeat method, whether they would admit to it or not. Hey, you get lonely sometimes and we’ve all been young… we’re not here to judge you. All we want is to help you get off with less hassle.

The only problem with pie fucking is that it always ends in a sticky mess. Um, not that we speak from experience! Ha ha. Nope, not us good, clean, non-pie fucking horn dogs at fifi.

But the fifi male masturbator can save you a lot of time and spare you potential humiliation on Pi Day and all the other days. Like the homemade masturbator that inspired its design, the fifi is easy to use and feels much better than your hand. Unlike a baked good, it doesn’t have the potential to burn you or leave you covered in pie filling. When you use a fifi, all you have to do is roll it up with a disposable sleeve inside. Squirt your favorite water-based lube inside the sleeve and have your merry way with this easy and versatile male sex toy.

There’s no need for you to go to all the trouble of baking an apple pie that you aren’t even gonna eat. Call us crazy, but we’d rather eat the pie instead of filling it up with our own cream.

Using the fifi men’s sex toy means that you can save those innocent baked goods for eating, not fucking. Get fifi here and save those pies.