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Stay warm by masturbating with your fifi

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Here in the land of fifi it’s as cold as a witch’s tit in a brass bra, as our granddaddies used to say. You know what we won’t be doing a lot of in January, February, and March? Going outside, duh. You know what we’ll be doing with most of our free time, besides binging on Netflix and Amazon Prime? Making good use of our fifi men’s sex toys. With its cushiony outer foam and fabric layer, fifi is kind of like a cuddly blanket for your penis. Read more

Happy New Year from fifi!

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Our favorite thing about 2015 has been bringing fifi to the world. The rest of the planet outside our offices didn’t know fifi at the beginning of the year and my, how time has flown since the first one of these adjustable, mess-free men’s sex toys rolled off the production line.

As you get ready to ring in 2016, you can probably expect to see a few hotties in tight clothes at your New Year’s Eve festivities. If you don’t already have a fifi male sex toy waiting for you at home, then you might be settling for your hand as you relieve a case of blue balls before you go to sleep. But you can fuck the pain away with a fifi male masturbator next time you’ve come home from a frustrating night out with lots of sexy, scantily clad babes, and it’ll feel way better than your hand. Order your fifi today and get ready to experience your favorite new toy. Read more

No hairy palms with a fifi sex toy for men

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The past might look better in the rear view mirror, but masturbation wasn’t always looked upon as favorably as we here at fifi headquarters think it should have been. As we say goodbye to the old year, let’s point and laugh at some of the old myths about the so-called “dangers” of male masturbation.

Authority figures told us unbelievable horror stories in a futile attempt to keep us from playing with ourselves. Everyone would know that we were perverts when they saw our hairy palms (apparently we wouldn’t just shave them if this one came true). The one about going blind from masturbating was scarier, but still ridiculous. Other killjoys decided to say that “self-abuse” would give us diseases or drive us insane. Read more

Stuff your stocking, i.e. your fifi male masturbator

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We all know holidays can stress you out. Maybe you’re panic-buying a gas station bottle of wine at the last minute because it slipped your mind that you were supposed to bring something to a Dirty Santa party. You put off buying a present for your brother and now you’re stuck buying him socks (again). Now you’re being dragged to the mall on December 26th when things go on clearance. And if we all hate Christmas music so much then why have we been hearing it in every store for a month already? Read more

Use the force with the fifi male masturbator

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You can’t get away from Star Wars these days, not even here on the fifi blog (sorry to those of you who are tired of it, all one or two of you). While we certainly haven’t hit the big time to a point where we could offer you a licensed fifi, we do like to think that our male sex toy is a good blank canvas for your imagination when you’re enjoying some alone time and, um, using the Force. We’ve got fifis for your inner Jedi or Sith. Read more

Avoid masturbation mishaps with the fifi sex toy

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We’ve probably all heard horror stories about masturbation gone terribly wrong. Not just the old classic you’ll go blind/hair will grow on your palms warnings, but actual, real-life cautionary tales. The kind of thing that never happens with a fifi male masturbation toy, in other words.

Fans of The Big Bang Theory surely remember the time Leonard and Raj took Howard to the emergency room when his robot hand got stuck on his penis (and he didn’t try the old IT trick of turning it off and on again). It was just a funny subplot on a sitcom, but if you know any ER nurses you’ll probably be able to get some similar entertaining stories out of them.

One time we heard about a guy who burned his dick on a car’s tail pipe because he took “autoerotic” much too literally. That one was probably fictional too, but the rest of these are real. Read more

Master baking with the fifi male masturbator

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Did you know that the fifi male sex toy can help you with your holiday baking? Or, more specifically, all the holiday baking that your lady friend is probably doing… not you, because you’re far too manly for that. (Don’t worry, we don’t judge you if you love to make casseroles or apple pies. Tasty food is tasty no matter who makes it.) You’d be surprised how useful this male sex toy can be for master bakers. Read more

This is your brain on fifi

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What happens in the brain during an orgasm has been the subject of many scholarly articles and scientific studies. It’s probably not something you think about as a casual masturbator or sex-haver, so it’s a good thing the scientists are looking out for us. At fifi, we like to read what the neurologists have to say about how sex affects the brain, and what happens in the brain during the whole process, from arousal to orgasm. Mostly we’re interested in it because we’re horny and thinking about orgasms makes us want to have more of them. When you work around male sex toys all day, it can turn you into an even bigger chronic masturbator. Read more

Greater sexual stamina through masturbation

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Did you know that the more you get yourself off, the longer you can last with a sexual partner? Masturbation is one of the time-tested ways to build up greater sexual stamina. It’s like working out, but a lot more pleasurable.

We think you probably know by now that masturbation can help you relieve stress, make you sleep more soundly, and even help you ward off sickness with a boosted immune system. We aren’t just making all that up; science is on our side.

But one of the greatest reasons to enjoy getting yourself off, even when you have a willing sex partner who’s also a great big ol’ horn dog, is the simple fact that more orgasms help you last longer the more you do it. Your fifi male masturbator can really help you with that. Read more

Holiday stress: masturbate it away with fifi

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Happy December, masturbators! We’re in the time of year when people eat a lot more than usual, maybe drink a lot more than usual, and of course, spend a lot more money than usual. Masturbation might take a back seat amid all the festivities, but we know there are a lot of you out there who are as dedicated to dancing with the one-eyed sailor as we are. We might be chronic self-abusers, but we’re dealing with holiday stress a lot better than we would if we deprived ourselves. The less we masturbate during the rush of gift buying, planning, and family visits, the higher our stress levels climb, so our fifi male masturbators are getting even more of a workout than usual these days. Having an orgasm is the cheapest and most enjoyable form of therapy we know. Read more