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fifi owners tell you why you need one, too

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Anyone who’s already the proud owner of a fifi can tell you that it’s the best sex toy for all the dudes who just want a tight hole to screw without any mess to clean or maintenance to perform. You won’t find an easier masturbation experience unless you want to settle for a date with Rosy Palmer, and let’s face it: fifi is better than your hand.

If you’re new to fifi, you might not know yet why it’s awesome and worth the low price. Maybe you just need more convincing. We’ve decided to let some of the many happy fifi owners tell you why they love their men’s sex toys. Names have been changed to protect the not-so-innocent.

“Finding a good, cheap male masturbator isn’t easy if you’re thick, but I can roll my fifi to my exact size. You know how your favorite jeans fit you better after you’ve owned them for a while? That’s how it is with fifi. The more I use it, the better it seems to ‘remember’ how to fit me.”—Thick Nick

“Even a lazy SOB like me wants a good toy for jerking off. I have two masturbators sitting in the bottom of my closet. I used them once or twice before I realized I didn’t want to go through the hassle of cleaning and even conditioning a sex toy. Hell, I barely use conditioner on my hair, so I’m not trying to worry about that with the thing I use for jerking off. And I like fifi way more than I like my hand or an old sock.”—Bob the Slob

“My girlfriend hates to be reminded that sometimes I masturbate. She thinks I should be saving it for her, as if I’m not already down to fuck any time she wants it. I’m a horn dog and I like to get off every day, rain or shine, girlfriend or not. Well, she didn’t even notice when I accidentally left my fifi sitting out on my night stand. She didn’t even ask questions. I’m happy and she’s happy.”—Sneaky Pete

“I don’t have a lot of money to spend on something I could just do with my hand, but I could easily afford the fifi and even the disposable sleeves don’t set me back that much. I buy the biggest packs they offer.”—Thrifty Thrill Seeker

Are you convinced yet? You can get fifi for yourself and be just as happy as all these satisfied fifi owners.