What exactly is erotic banana eating, you may ask? Oh, surely you’ve squirmed at the sight of a hottie consuming a banana. We can’t count the number of times we’ve watched such an innocent activity and wondered how it would feel to have those lips wrapped around a certain appendage. If you’ve never experienced this phenomenon, then you’re obviously not a Chinese government official. The China-based New Express Daily reports that the Chinese government has banned the practice of live-streaming “erotic banana-eating” online. Specifically, they don’t want women or younger girls to do it.
The Chinese Ministry of Culture announced in April that it was investigating live-streaming platforms for alleged pornographic and violent content. All live-streaming services must now monitor all activity on their platforms to prohibit “inappropriate and erotic” content. It’s in the interest of protecting “social morality,” they say.
In even worse news for pervy live-stream users in China, they’re not just cracking down on luscious phallic fruit-based activity. Women and girls also can’t broadcast from their webcams while wearing stockings or garter belts.
Chinese live-stream users (mostly the men) are reportedly big fans of webcam sessions hosted by young women and girls. Mind you, not all of them are stocking-wearing temptresses out to corrupt the masses through erotic banana eating. Some are only there to chat with their audience and sing for them. About a third of the viewers are under 18 and 60% of the webcam girls are under 22.
There’s no word on how the government will decide what’s erotic. Maybe it’s whatever makes them personally want to indulge their repressed desire for masturbation. They also haven’t said whether male live-streamers can eat bananas seductively, or whether it’s okay for the girls to eat other phallic produce such as cucumbers.
One more question: Do plantains count?Back